Death

I’ve told my children that when I die, to release balloons in the sky to celebrate that I graduated. For me, death is a graduation.

– Dr.Elisabeth Kubler-Ross, M.D. (A medical doctor, psychiatrist, and an expert in thanatology – scientific discipline of death and dying)

I have left the title with just this single word because nothing else added after this word is sufficient to explain the understanding which this phenomenon  brings into our lives.

I have met people who have lost their dear ones, listened to their heartaches and witnessed the void it has set into their lives. Yet, until the time I experienced one myself, I did not realize what death can teach us which life does not remind us about.

Though I have come across few relatives’ death, the first death of somebody with whom I had spent day and night for 12 long years was my pet dog Ceasar’s death. People who have lived with dogs will know how these little ones dissolve into our everyday lives and families. With today it’s a year since he left us and as I went over my last year’s journal, I found these words I had written on that night.

Love – Life is all about spreading love to everybody. This is what the last 10 days (while he was unwell) and Ceasar’s death had taught me. There is no harm in loving others…..Feeling for others gives a new meaning to life…..Everybody, I am sure will realize this at least once in their lifetime. Sadly most realize when they become old on the death-bed when they have missed to love many they have met…..Love can save the earth from guilt and regret…..What Ceasar has taught me, nobody else has before. What a great soul he is – decided to undergo pain to make us learn our lives’ lessons.

True that two wet  eyes, a heavy heart and a grief-stricken soul have written these words that night. 365 days past these emotions, today I am reflecting on why death reminded me of love. Isn’t it more connected with sadness, longings, bereavement? Then why love? What made me write on love?

It is not just one of those periods when emotions blindly mask the existence of a mind. Diving a lot more deeper through the tunnel of superficial emotions, death sheds light on few irreversible verities – The truth

In the impermanence of reality

In the uncertainty of existence

In the emptiness of shallow possessions

And that’s where and when an understanding of the concept of love springs – not of the kind of love we talk about everyday – love of the kind we have not heard and spoken of!

More on death and love in the coming posts…..

Photo Courtesy:

Painting (Death) – www.currys.com

Painting (Tunnel of Death) – www.presidiacreative.com

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14 thoughts on “Death

  1. One thing I always envied about dogs is their ability to love unconditionally. One night I was reading a book, and to give my eyes a rest I looked up from the pages and there was my dog Harley laying in front of me with chin resting on his front paws. As soon as I looked up, we made eye contact and his tail immediately started thumping on the floor. It was almost as if he had been waiting for me to just look at him. I was envious in a way.

    I wish we had the equivalent of a tail wag so that those we care about would just know we’re happy that they’re in our lives. Why does unconditional love come so easy for our pets and not us?

    Death does indeed teach us how precious life is and even if we live to be a hundred years, it’s still a limited amount of time. And yet we seem to make odd choices of what we do with that time. We have our daily rituals of grooming and health, but often never rituals of love and friendships.

    We brush our teeth a few times a day because we know it preserves them. If only we would take that same amount of time each day and attend to those dear to us — to preserve our relationships for years to come.

    I enjoy your blog. I look forward to reading more.

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    • Oh yes, they just wait for us to look at them. And the excitement they get in such small things is really admirable. May be love and loyalty is in their genes!

      Witnessing other’s death comes as a sudden blow in our lives. I can imagine what made Siddartha get into the path of enlightment to turn Lord Buddha. But again the realization in us lasts only few days or months and then the running race continues. It’s bad that we lack a constant reminder.

      Appreciate your avid thoughts, Antonio though was disappointed to see your empty blog 😉 Hope you start posting many. Please keep visiting. Thanks for your time.

      Like

  2. Really thoughtful words:-

    “In the impermanence of reality

    In the uncertainty of existence

    In the emptiness of shallow possessions”

    After the sadness passes away and after the above truths hit you hard initially, there is the dawn of:-

    “And that’s where and when an understanding of the concept of love springs – not of the kind of love we talk about everyday – love of the kind we have not heard and spoken of!”

    Nice words.

    Interests me even more of the thought of using it for counselling during grief. I wonder if we can devise a form of counselling that helps this transition from the sadness and shallow-empty life feeling (that may lead to depression) to feeling of love and fullness, which is a mature way of overcoming grief.

    Waiting for more posts on the dreaded topic of death!!

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    • I can imagine how difficult the job of a counsellor is.

      Most people who are bereaved of their loved ones take a long time to come out of the sadness. In fact few take a long time to accept that the person is no more existing. Followed by acceptance comes the need to be alone, at least mentally if not physically. And this phase decides how they are taking the loss. Most people react with anger and irritation after the episode, anger at just everything in life. Some people dwell again and again on the grief and sadness. Its only few who come close to love and fullness.

      And no matter what we say to comfort them, they are already into a loop of thoughts and its only with time and self efforts they will be able to come out of the loop.

      Its definitely a great thought of devising a form of counselling this way. Good wishes for your work. Thanks and yes, I hope too I continue to write more on death.

      Like

  3. Time is the healer .. True !
    Counselling does not help in overcoming grief in any major way because the acceptance should come from within.
    Counselling sessions help to keep in touch with the person to keep a watch on depressive symptoms and to make sure they do not commit suicide.

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  4. Vedic take on death is something as follows
    When the living entity passes from present body to the next body which is created by his own karma he becomes absorbed in the pleasurable and painful sensations of the new body and completely forgets the experiences of the previous body, this total forgetfullness of one’s previous material identity which comes about for one reason or the other is called death so death is forgetfullness of the previous body just like birth is a persons total identification with a new body just as a person situtated in the present body having existed prior to it thinks that he is only recently come into being….Whats ur take on this????

    Like

    • Your vedic take on death was interesting. I do believe that a part of our consciousness gets carried beyond death.

      But again the perceptions of terms like body, mind, soul, consciousness are as varied as the population.

      I wish God permits me to blog after my death so that i update you all about what happens on the other side 😀

      Liked by 1 person

  5. Pingback: 600 Days, 60 Posts and 600 Comments! « Pages From Serendipity

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